“But now, O Lord, You are our Father; we are the clay, and You our potter; we are all the work of Your hand.” (Isaiah 64:8)
God is reshaping my life, again. Seven months ago I walked away from a large ministry platform and a job where I had a voice, impact, and visibility. I walked away and started a small start up ministry. No insurance, no team, no guarantee of income or impact.
People tell me, “God’s going to do great things through your new ministry. It’s going to impact thousands.” I smile and nod.
I know they mean well… I just know it’s not true. Not because what I have to offer isn’t valuable but because Scripture doesn’t tell us this. Paul went from preaching to thousands to speaking to one, his bodyguard. God doesn’t promise us a successful ministry life (at least not as we define it).
More than once, as I sit alone in my office writing blogs, books, messages, I’ve wondered does this really matter? Is anyone listening?
I’m woefully aware my ego is involved here.
I suspect we all feel this at one time or another. Whether it’s starting out in corporate America…or leaving corporate America to be a stay at home mom…or retirement…or becoming a full time caretaker of a loved one.
It’s hard to feel like you aren’t seen anymore, that what you do doesn’t matter.
Recently I started meditating on Ecclesiastes. King David’s son, Solomon, is trying to make sense of his life and the world around him. In chapter 1:2 he concluded, “Everything is meaningless…complete meaningless!”
Then he lists the futility of chasing money, fame, women, wine, and so on and so on.
But in between all the “this is a meaningless pursuit,” are these statements of what is good and worthwhile. He repeats these statements several times, in different ways, but they all point to the same idea.
In 2:24 he said, “So I decided there is nothing better than to enjoy food and drink and to find satisfaction in work. Then I realized that these pleasures are from the hand of God.”
We read something similar in 3:2 then again in 5:18. “Even so, I have noticed one thing, at least, that is good. It is good for people to eat, drink, and enjoy their work under the sun during the short life God has given them, and to accept their lot in life.”
I’ve got the “eat and drink” thing down. What I’m trying to learn is to embrace, even enjoy, my lot and my work.
I’m in process…as I sit in my office, alone…wondering if any of this matters.
Mon, July 16, 2012
by Jackie Roese filed under